.Wednesday, April 23 ' 6:37 PM Y
This is her beginning, Thanks for viewing =)
i feel totally out of the circle! even thou i am living under one roof!
my friends are far far far away from me! my sister and brother too.
hope that i could find someone that would listen to me, care for me, be there for me...
my family broke apart for no reason! and i hated that!
i know that i'm not good at my speech.
i barely express it out, cos i thou i might hurt others.
now that i learnt about it, i am hurting myself more =( i need a hug and deeep big hug!!
hardly have words with them.. they thought they know how i feel but i doubt so..
things turn worst bcos of not communicating.
at times, i shut the door and cried myself to bed,
find stuff to do to kill all my spare and lonely days!
i hated those feelings, they might think that i enjoyed it but not at all.
soon it become a habit for me, automatically i does that as my daily routine.
when i did something, never a word came from them.
instead those words only goes around themselves!
my credit, reward and hard work, seem to be part of my myself.
it is like, oh ya.. that's what she suppose to be and do!
come on, i think all living human being needs loves and care!
i showed them but i dont get it!
i always tell myself that things will be better the next day dont worry abt it,
they will realise it!
maybe to them i am the stronger person, i have hard feelings (well, i do admit it).
that is just the outside me, they never truthfully know the inside me..
soon i become someone that is alone and not knowing what the hell is going on!!!!
i need to go find myself, the truthfully, cheerful me back~
